Obsession Is A Way Of Life

and again. geez, diaryland is having fun scaring the shit out of me. I may not update OFTEN, but I'd miss it if my diary went bye bye. a large part because of my linkies list, but also just cuz I like knowing its HERE.

so I talked to Tron-man the other day. He was online and sent me a message. if he hadn't, we probably wouldn't have talked, cuz I wouldn't have messaged him. I'm not mad at him, and though I miss him, its better as long as I don't think about it. I've spoken to him, what, 4 times in 3 months? and after about 3 years of him being my best friend, always there for me, and we'd said SO MANY times that if we ever got significant others that we wouldn't drop the other and our other would have to understand our friendship, that really hurts. I mean, I knew that it would happen, one of us would find someone and the other would be pushed out, cuz to believe and expect otherwise is really kinda unreasonable, but it still hurts, cuz I FEEL dropped, and I feel like those semi-promises (I can't remember if the word promise was ever spoken, but it was always a promise on my side) meant nothing. which, like I said, is unreasonable!! so fweh! I'm not mad, really, I mean, just last week I was getting mad at myself and feeling bad because I didn't really miss him. And I still don't. as long as I don't talk to him. cuz then I don't think about it.
I do miss him though. I'll be reading my stories, and come to a line that I find fairly amusing, that I would used to have shared with him when he was online, but then I think to myself...wait, he's not on ever anymore. Or I think of when he used to come over and watch anime with me, and now I just watch it myself. and I DO miss him..but I don't. it weird and I don't understand it. But, its all good.

KITTY KAT IS GOING AWAAAAAY!!! *Cry* now who am I going to look forward to opening with?? and Jenessa, kat and I won't be going for our tattoos and going out on Kat's birthday, and, and, and...*pout* gonna miss my Kitty Kat.

Duo is the CUTEST HAMPSTER ON THE PLANET!!! at least, I think so. but I may be biased.

going now. byebye!! ^-^

luv, Me